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Friday, June 20, 2008

WHY FAMILY MATTERS

Let’s face it, we are all capable of being more generous, open, and loving however- we aren’t always willing to do it. I have realized today that family matters more than we know. Whenever doubt or worry plague me, I can always count on my sister Ipuna to shed some light my way. Although she is a mother of 3 and a wonderful wife to a husband that goes to school full time- she’s always by my side to take my calls. I am her older sister, but she always seems to make a way to let me know she loves me.

I am not a mother but I've always wanted to be one. I see my sister’s as a great example of what a mother should be. I can’t remember my niece and nephew’s age to save my life. I’ve got so many sister’s with baby’s now. My oldest sister Maria has 3 kids, my second oldest sister has 1 girl, and my second youngest sister has 3 kids. My little sister and I don’t have any children yet! Anyway, Ipuna is an amazing person and I hope everyone has a sister just like mine. I recall people asking us in the past (before she was a wife and mother) if we were best friends? Well, we are! People couldn’t believe that we were sisters because we were so close, we always seemed to be the best of friends. It’s alright to actually get along with siblings.

The one thing that I love to do more than anything is write, as it has become a part of who I am and why I chose to get into the film industry. I called my sister the other day because I simply wanted to discuss the script I just finished. She was breast feeding and told me she had her “Hide-A-Hooter” wrapped around her? How funny is that! Well, that’s what the thing is actually called and it’s exactly that. She was breast feeding in public with her “Hide-A-Hooter” wrapped around to hide her- you know what, and watching her 2 other children (still can’t remember how old they are….Kobi is 7 yr and Xayla is 3 yrs…I think). Without going into what she was doing, she closely paid attention to what I had to say. This blew me away because she could have been irritated and angry but she wasn’t. She genuinely wanted to hear what I had to say and usually I’m the one rambling at the mouth about something.


I know we all deal with our own issues but in the end- family means the most to us all! What happens when we are going through a tough “writer’s block” moment or when we are in between jobs trying to settle in to something? Who is here for us? I have close friends but my sister is one of my most favorite people in my life. She’s just not my sister- she’s an amazing person. She juggles driving, having 3 kids, working full time so that her husband does not have to work and focus only on dental school, and she still makes time to talk to me. My sister Angela is the same way too. She calls me when she can, but she has a child and 3 jobs! Whenever I miss her call- I feel bad because I know that she went out of her way for me.

I am not a mother, I am not a wife…I’m a film student graduate and an artist pursuing my dream in Los Angeles, California. As shallow and cold this place can be, it can be equally rewarding, beautiful, and amazingly welcoming. It’s not easy dealing with L.A. and it’s not easy dealing with all the economical changes. Current changes has included: New Line Cinema and Warner Brother’s Independent closing shop, recovering over the writer’s strike, and now a possible SAG strike. If you include the gas prices, the increase loss of jobs (a part of GM closing down and some of the airline’s as well)- there are many unemployed people looking for work. It can be very discouraging and in these times what has helped me the most is family.

It’s amazing when I can simply call one of my 4 sisters and I know that if they are busy- they will call me back and I have someone to talk to. More importantly, I realize that it’s not always about me- it’s about listening. What is active listening anyway? The key to better communication with ANYONE is active listening, because listening is an ART. When you learn how to truly digest what other's say, you begin to understand that there is more to life than complaining about the drama in our own. So, the next time you are feeling down or begin worrying about the chaos exploding around you- stop and think about what someone else might have going on in their own world. We often don’t realize how easy it is for all of us to forget that there is an entire world out there with situations far worse than our own. More importantly, we have family that love and care for us and friends who would drop everything for us. I have friends that will stop what ever it is they are doing- just to let me know that I have their full, undivided attention.

It’s time for all of us to do the same. If you are dealing with issues in your life and you really need someone to listen to you. Try calling someone: a family member or a friend and ask them how they are doing. Better yet, try listening to them speak and just wait until they are completely done before telling them about your problems. More chances than not, you will realize something about yourself- life is not so bad and that the world does NOT revolve around you. This week- I learned that once again and realized that I have a lot to be thankful for and too many people in my life that I owe my life to.

1 comment:

K.C. & Ipuna said...

That's so nice. I am working on my listening as well. I tend to jusr talk. Maybe that's why we get along. No one else understands our fast speaking craziness. We just need to "calm down!" is what they say. So funny. It's called a "hooter-hider" same difference. Kobi is 8, but you were close.